Fear

September 2005

You don't know me
Don't pretend you do
Don't stand there
Judging me with your eyes
believing the stories
believing the lies
You don't know my history
Where I've come from
Where I'll be
You think I'm weird, a freak
But look into my heart
Go ahead take a peak
I'm really no different you see
We both laugh, love, hurt, cry
So why do you hate me?
Why do you care?
You stand there with a judging stare
I'm screaming inside
Can't you hear?
Why is it difference that you fear?

and more 

more KWKAT laughter 

KWKAT laughter 

PF INVASION! 

Fursuiters actually sitting still, a rarety! 

Tiger Tails!! 

Badger Brigade! 

Too much kitty crack! 

I'll take the tears as a yes! 

The most important question... :) 

SonicBlu 

so hot! -panting- 

Miss You

2001 (I know I promised this poem would stay hidden, but I'm breaking that promise.)

I stood at the edge of the cliff
And looked out over the waves
As the crashed against the rocks
I remembered how we explored those rocks
Together, hand in hand.

You would look at the gulls
As they soared over head
And wished to fly above
The troubles of your world.

How I wished I could take those troubles
And throw them into the waves
To be carried to sea.

I never could do that though
Things are different now
That you are gone.

I never go to the rocks anymore
On the day of your funeral
I threw a single rose into the waves
I hope your in heaven
Soaring like the birds

Why?
Why did you do that?
Not even seventeen,
And your life has come to an end.

I miss you
I took your necklace
And threw it into the water.
As it went under the waves
So did I
We'll be together sooner than you think...

Snapshots

Aug. 2005

Windows to our lives
A moment of joy
In a life of pain
Glimpses of happy times
As if that is all we ever have
Dare to dream
Of a life of snapshot moments
Smiles and laughter
Birthdays, weddings
And happy ever afters
Maybe one day
We can make our lives
Nothing but those moments
That we prize.

June 12, 2005

For Brian and Tawnya Rogers

On this day you gave your heart
And opened the doors
For a brand new start
You're joined as one
What God has given
Let never be undone
You've pledged your love
As beautiful and new
As a snow white dove
In the morning dew.
My hope for you both is
When you're old and gray
May you still feel the love
You feel today.

I Want To Be

I want to be a teacher
I want to be a firefighter,
A policeman, and an ambulance driver.

I want to be a pilot
I want to be a doctor,
A nurse and a veterinarian.

I want to be an architect
I want to be an actor
A singer and an athlete.

I want to be a mechanic
I want to be a pastor,
A priest, and a rabbi.

I want to be ME

How It Used To Be

Oct. 2000

I toss and turn
Thinking of you
Why? I wonder
Why can't you and I
Still be together?
You'll be married tomorrow
Tomorrow...
Tomorrow always held such promise
A promise of new kisses
Of renewed love
Of us...
I dream of you and I
Holding each other
No one else in the world
But I awaken to find
It's your wedding day
And your so happy
"Good Luck", I tell you
And as you walk away
To claim your bride
I think of what tomorrow
Holds in store for you
And your new wife
Happiness and love I'm sure
But for me just another dream
Of how it used to be...

Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow

Oct. 2000

Yesterday...
You looked into my eyes
And told me you loved me
I was certain we'd be
Together forever.

Today...
You swore
You still loved me
But you found someone knew.

Tomorrow...
You'll tell me
You will always love me
But your getting married.

I'll smile and hide
All my hurting
Because I will always
Love you.

Night Watch

May 2005

Lurking in the shadows
Hunting for prey
Her fear she never shows
Watching and waiting
The tigress sulks along
Breathlessly anticipating
She needs this hunt
Needs this thrill
It's a fire deep in her heart
It can't be ignored
Suddenly there's movement
She pounces and gives chase
But alas the chance is gone
Her prey is lost
She heads home with a yawn
She'll have to hunt another day.

Autumn

October 2004

Leaves are changing
there's cold in the air
Animals are gathering food
The trees are growing bare
Hayrides down the street
Pumpkins on the porch
Hot chocolate tasting sweet
Long, cold walks
Walking hand in hand
Fireside talks
there's change throughout the land
Time to get out the winter gear
It's that time of year
I love this atmosphere
autumn is here!

Far Away

August 2001

You're so far away
but even through the miles
I think of you everyday

I miss your touch,
Holding your hand in mine
I want to hold you so much

We're so far apart I know
And time seems to go so slow.
At night it seems
you are here with me
Cuz you're in every one of my dreams

I could stay here
And do what my parents want me to
Or I could follow my heart
And my heart leads straight to you

as I look up at the moon
I know in my heart
we'll be together soon.

Different

March 2001 (EWW)

When we first met
I felt a connection
Like we shared a common bond.
We're different, you and I
Different from the rest of the world
Mabey we know to much
Mabey we know to little
No matter what, I do know
That we don't quite belong here
We haven't found our foot hold
With Gods help though
I'm sure we'll find where we belong
No matter where our lives take us
When you need a friend, need love
You can find everything
In my arms, and Gods.

(P.S. EWW.. I do hope wherever you are, your finding your place in this world...)

Till We Are One

Take me to a place
Where the roses bow
Gently in the wind.
Take me into your loving arms.
Hold and comfort me
Until the end.
Kiss away my tears.
Tell me everything
Of your dreams and fears.
Hold me till we are one.
Look into my eyes.
My love for you
Has just begun.

My Love

2002 (BKR)

Everyone always leaving
Not A true moment spent
Leaving A broken heart
Is this the way it's ment?
To be left and unloved,
Is this my forever part?
Then one day
The door opened again
And instead of someone
Going their separate way
You walked in.
You said you loved me,
I would not believe
You said you'd make me see
That this is how it was to be
Please leave I said
My heart feels left for dead
You said, My love for you remains true
I finally admited
I love you, too.

Lies

In the bar
They dance, and spin.
Each trying to impress someone new.
Each pretending to be someone else
Something they're not.
Reminds me of high school
It was all about popularity
Who was the prettiest
Who was most athletic.
Do we ever really stop pretending.
Do we ever alow ourselves to be who we truley are
Or do we always lie
And do we lie only to others
Or do we also lie to ourselves?
Do we ever REALLY know who we are?

Labyrinth of Love

I'm stuck here
In this labyrinth of love
Searching endlessly
For your smiling face.
I feel as though
I'm running out of time
And this endless maze
Seems to have no rhyme.
I search the heavens above
Hoping for a sign
Then I realized my love
Was what I needed to listen to all the time
If I follow my heart
All the way from the start
I over come the strife
To begin the rest of my life;
With you.

If You Told Me

If you told me you loved to dance
I would hire an entire band for you,
And sing you softly to sleep each night

If you told me you liked to fly
I would give you wings
That would take you anywhere

If you told me you liked my smile
I would smile all the time

I would do anything for you
I only ask one thing in return,
For you to love me
Like I love you

Untitled

July 2002 (BMG)

Hurt and alone
Feelings of pain
I could not condone
Carrying a paintbrush
To hide the scars
If needed in a rush
Never to be loved
Or so I thought
But then you held me
Not just me, but my heart
You loved and respected me
Like never before
I love you so much
Your handsome smile
Your eyes, your touch
Say it now, and say it true
We'll be friends
Till the world is through

Lie To Me

October 2000

Lie to me...
Tell me you love me,
You want to spend
Eternity together.

Lie to me...
Tell me you want to marry me,
To devote yourself to me,
And grow old together.

Don't tell me the truth
It doesn't matter
You'll meet someone new tomorrow
And tell her all the same
But tonight it's just us so...
Lie to me.

Good-bye

March 2002

I love you
maybe that's my problem
I want you to go away
No wait. Please stay
I can't control my feelings
And I'm so unsure
Of what to say
Is there a cure
For this broken heart?
Cuz without you
I'm missing a part
It's best that I go
But always know that
I love you.

His Hands

This was writen for Pathfinder Sabbath at my church, where I read it aloud. Jan. 2002

He holds the world
And all that's in it.
Animals, people
Anything that would fit.
Sin and destruction everywhere
And no one seems to care
Desiese, death, storms
The dark cloud forms
With a tear shed
He wipes it all away
The world goes on
Without a thank you said.

Thoughts

This is just my thinking instead of a poem..
I've noticed lately that it seems I'm the only one around my age attempting to better myself.. Most of my friends that are around my age are like, I was born into this life, I'm gone die in this life why bother fighting it. Or they are trying to get ahead in life by "cheating". You know, not willing to work for what they have, play lottery to get rich, pursue a spouse that has money, etc. or they are actually sliding backwards into a worse life than they were raised. I can think of very few my age that are actually attempting to better themselves. And those couple have great respect from me, but the majority just seems to not care. It makes me feel even older, more mature, like my thinking is much farther ahead than others my age. It is just unusual for someone in their early 20s to be trying to have a better life than they were raised in or have others just gotten lazy and I just missed the memo? And I'm not putting down the lottery, I voted to bring it to Tennessee, but when you just play the lot and not mix hard work with it, ur just cheating. and I'm not putting down the life i was raised in, I just want to be even better, even if I had been born rich, then I'd b striving to get even more money, and donate even more to help others.. I want to be able to give my friend $200. for their bills they cant quite pay, and not think of it. I want to have a nice roomy home that my friends can come to and always feel welcome, I want to be a stay at home mom and have cookies ready for my kids when they get home (and I know that sounds like a mother from the 50's but i have no intention of being the "rose colored glasses" mother, but I do want to b there for my kids and raise them, not have the TV raise them).
I guess the biggest difference is I want to look at what I do, look at my life and say "you know Daddy and Grandpa Dickey would be proud of what I have become." Both are dead now, but have had a major hand in shaping my life, and making me what I am today. And I want to make them proud. Maybe its just that others don't have people like that in their lives. If that's the case then I am blessed, cuz though they are gone, sadly, they did bless my life while here and give me that advantage of wanting to please them..
I dunno, I just feel like very few of my friends actually think they can or want to have a better life, and that just seems a bit sad to me.. Ok I'm done..

One Lone Soldier

Written for all our troops throughout the ages.. 2004

He gave his all
Fighting for our rights
Watching fellow soldiers fall
Dying by his side
The fighting is done
He lost his innocence
But the war is won
Its time to go home
Home- A place of love
But it will never be the same
The war has changed him
As he stands alone on the battlefield
He knows the future looks dim
He rides home alone
The world no longer needs him
His works will never be known

What Shall We Do

Writen shortly after Sept. 11, 2001 In memory of those that were lost...

Innocent blood was shed
What shall we do
They attacked then fled
What shall we do
Killed our loved ones
What shall we do
Our daughters, our sons
What shall we do.

Let your voices ring out loud
that's what you shall do
Hold the flag up proud
that's what you shall do
Hold your children tight
that's what you shall you
Love them with all your might
that's what you shall do
And let those you love know
You're with them wherever they go..

The Rain

This came on a rainy night, after discussing mean and rude people on planet furry. Jan. 2005

The rain finally came tonight
Came upon the land
Like a dark creature
Unheeding to those who prefer the dry
Never pausing in its downward fall
Washing over the land
As if it was attempting
To wash the earth of its evils
Evils that we humans bring
To our own world.
People hid in their homes
Animals in their dens
As if to hide from this dark creature
The creature, not noticing its presence was unwanted
Continued coming, continued falling
Seeming to never cease in its cleansing task
But its work was in vain
For never could anything,
But the humans who bring the evils
Truly succeed in cleansing the world

Forever

Nunya business who this was originally writen for... June 2001

Together...
We thought We'd always be
Then she came between
you and me
I see you around sometimes
You never even look at me
I think of all
Our memories
And it makes me want to cry
How could things go so wrong?
I loved you endlessly.
You guys are so happy
I'll miss you
And your love
Forever...

Thank You

This was written for all my friends who have cared for me and loved me unconditionally. Feb. 2001

Thank you for;
Knowing my weaknesses,
And never making
Fun of me.

Thank you for;
Knowing when I was wrong
And gently correcting me.

Thank you for;
A shoulder to cry on,
And a hand to hold.

Thank you for;
Being my bestfriend
And most of all
Thank you for,
Your love.

Daddy

This was the poem that got it all started... Sept. 2000

You've watched me grow
Through the years
From changing diapers
To calls from boys
From buying me a new bike
To buying me new make-up.
From old blue jeans
To a bright new dress
You're always there
Through highs and lows
For 16 years you've
Loved me so
And for 16 years
I've been proud
To call you;
Daddy

I gave my dad this poem on his 43rd birthday, writen in the card I gave him (which I now have) and his reaction to the poem made me think. "You know if I can get Daddy to react to what I write, mabey I can get others..." So I started writing more stuff again and have now been published many times. This poem has been published in the book, "The International Who's-Who of Poetry"